I got a promotional coupon from my bank today offing $100 if I open a business checking account. This is what will transpire tomorrow when I go to open the account:
Me: Hi. I would like to open a business checking account and redeem this coupon for $100.
Teller: Okay. What is the name of your business?
Me: None of your business.
(awkward pause)
Me: None of your business! That’s the name of the business, “None Of Your Business.” That’s the name of the shop! We sell, like, curtains and blinds and hats that go down far and cover your face with sunglasses. And window tinting. And then it’ll be so successful and I’ll open another business that’s called “None Of Your Beeswax,” but it won’t sell hats or tint or curtains, but it’ll sell, like, honey and candles, and, like, candle-making kits and stuff. Am I gonna need two checking accounts then?
Teller: You can’t open a business checking account.
Me: Well, there’ll be beekeeper stuff too, if you ever want to get into beekeeping or wear it for a Halloween costume or something.
